Thursday, July 2, 2009


~But this is me...~

If you are a lover of any alterative fashion you will hear or have complaints about being accepted. Most of the time the complaints are about family members and other times friends. One must remember that it is human nature for people to shun or ridicule something they do not understand.

If the persons having the problem are close to you this might be a chance to open their minds and maybe increase the follows of that fashion. However, always remember that your family loves you and REAL friends will never try to put you down about something you are excited about.

The only things you can do are:

1.) Stay calm
- becoming upset, yelling, and seeming irrational will not help your cause

2.) Clarify the fashion as best as possible
- explain how the fashion started, where it originated from
- show magazines, videos, and articles

3.) If your family still doesn’t approve except their wishes
- save money and wait until you move out. Then you can dress however you like.
- incorporate small accessories or items into normal clothes/ room

As for the matter of peer acceptance, that is a harder fact to shallow. Society has developed a means to keep people from accepting deviations from the norm, peer pressure. People no matter the age have to deal with peer pressure. You can either cave and fit into the social norm or you can express your true self and show the world who you really are.

Society will either accept this and love your uniqueness, hate the fashion all together, or express a lack of interest. Remember though, if it makes you happy wear it. If you are happy it should not matter what anyone thinks or says.


Violet LeBeaux said...

This such a common issue amongst new/younger Lolitas and you've covered it really well. I think that the best way to win over confused parents/family is with information and by easing them in. Before I started working from home I did this at work too, first a small hair bow, then the shoes, then a skirt without a petti... over a couple of weeks my co-workers would get used to it and even come to love it.

It can feel so horrible when you finally find something you love and are comfortable with but are ridiculed by complete strangers. I think that if new Lolitas stick it out, it gets better. You develop a thicker skin and make friends who love you for you, not because you just happen to fit in. When I first got into Lolita if someone called me Little Beau Peep I got really upset, now I hear it as "Wow that's such a beautiful jsk that I had to tell you how cute you look!" ^_^

Lady Kristen said...

It is a very common and sensitive issue. Thank you. I had trouble wording this entry and I kept editing the information before I posted this.

When I was younger I introduced my family to lolita fashion little by little as well.

You definitely develop a thinker skin as your love for something develops.