Monday, August 23, 2010


Pet peeve #3: Better than thou

No matter which era you want to attribute your inspiration for lolita fashion to derive from, there was a class system. The royalty and upper classes could afford the expensive, finer materials and luxurious accessories. While the lower class could only afford mediocre materials and cheap, plain, or no accessories. Clothing was an easy indicator of what class you belonged in. Fashion has not changed much over the centuries. Some lolitas can afford or fit into brand items and others cannot. Thus creating a class system of popularity and elitism.

The pompous attitude disgusts the people that made the elitists popular and their reputation slowly disintegrates. There is no benefit in looking down on the people that made you popular, without them you would not be famous. However, brand is not the only thing that brings out elitist attitude. New members, style differences, and being popular on forums or in the blogosphere can also induce snobbish behaviors. No one likes a snob. But there are ways to tune down the attitude.

Accept others. New members are essential to fashion. The more customers a brand has the longer they are able to stay in business and the more pieces they will make. The increase in overseas lolitas has gained the attention from brands. Thus resulted in BABY stores in France and America and multiple shipping serices. New and younger members also inspire designers to bring new idea to our favorite fashion.

Use restraint. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. No matter how you feel about non-brand wears, plus sized lolita, or brand hoarders it would be best to keep it to yourself or your close friends. Some people are easily offended and might take your opinions as being haughty.

Try to be courteous. When someone asks for constructive criticism try to be polite. Offer helpful advice without any prejudice. If the person does not accept the advice simply do not offer any more help to him or her.

Help others become the best they can be. Some itas cannot become great lolitas without the advice and help of others. For itas to learn from their mistakes veteran lolitas should teach them how to fix their faux pas. The more knowledgeable a person is the less annoying they are and the less blunders they will make.

Talk to others. One of the main complaints people have about elitists is their refusal to speak with people lower than them. Just by being cordial to others you are less likely to be labeled a snob.

image from: CartoonStock


Konan. said...

thank you for writing this!
I agree with everything you said and I hope people really listen to the points you made! (:

Lady Kristen said...

Konan. Thank you! I'm glad you like this pet peeve. I thought with so many negative secrets and gossip lately this would be a nice topic to write about.

KittyDragon said...

I agree with you 100%. I only have a few brand pieces b/c I can't afford most of them. I have some very off brand that I love and sometimes I'm afraid to share it with the community b/c I don't want to hear the negative talk. We love lolita b/c it makes us feel beautiful so lets share that beauty with everyone not hoard it to only a few who think they are the best.

Leaa said...

I agree with you, and it's a good thing you wrote this... but it's sad that you have to write a guide about how to be nice.. while it should be just common knowledge! D:

Lady Kristen said...

KittyDragon: It is just a fact of life that the girls/boys that can afford and fit in brand will have the ability to have a closet full of brand. This article was meant to help some of the segregation in our subculture caused by elitist attitude diminish.

Leaa : It should be common knowledge! But American society seems to have forgotten that. I work with children and adolescents on the weekends. I cannot tell you how many times I have to remind them to say 'please' and 'thank you' all weekend long.